


Small Steps

by HerbertBest



Series: Two Lonely People [8]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, M/M, Polyfidelity, Romance, Undecided Relationship(s), Uneven Polyamory Dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 10:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8141120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HerbertBest/pseuds/HerbertBest
Summary: Ross is wonderfully warm and soft in his arms.  That’s what Barry will think of when they count the cost of this, look back on the car-crash accident of their romance and wonder, from the safety of their bed, how they managed to walk away alive from the burning, broken wreck of their former lives.He is warm, soft, and loving, and it was enough to make him forget the cost of their desire.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cottonstones](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cottonstones/gifts).



Ross is wonderfully warm and soft in his arms. That’s what Barry will think of when they count the cost of this, look back on the car-crash accident of their romance and wonder, from the safety of their bed, how they managed to walk away alive from the burning, broken wreck of their former lives.

He is warm, soft, and loving, and it was enough to make him forget the cost of their desire.

 

*** 

 

The flirtation is gentle, funny – easy enough to ignore at first, until the two of them reach spontaneously toward each other and fall mouth-first into a kiss. It was fine, just to kiss for awhile; to make out in the front seat of his car, in the back of taping room. Ross tastes like irresponsibility, like a weekend bender, like beer and bubblegum and rash decisions made far too quickly. Barry falls under his spell but Ross, he realizes, is just as enamored, just as passionate about what he feels in turn.

 

**** 

 

He will not love Ross until he knows Holly knows what’s going on; cannot let himself go. He pictures her clear blue eyes and her secret smile and can see all of the hurt they might do to her reflected back in her gaze.

He adores the girl, head to foot; she’s like a little sister, bright, innocent, loving, and he can’t tolerate the idea of false witness to be bourn against her.

But then there’s Ross. Ross with his big blue eyes and easy smile, and his warm, loving, insistent heart. His partner in every single meaning of the word. Barry has to bite the inside of his lip to keep himself from telling Holly anything, has to let Ross work at his own pace and allow him to manage his own marriage.

Watching Holly cry, watching her leave the room in pain when the truth is presented to her, is much much more difficult than he thought it would be.

 

***

Barry’s never been the third wheel for anyone. He’s just not that kind of guy; he’s _nice_ , and he’s often called this with mild, playful scorn. To sneak a kiss and a fuck with his boyfriend – even with Holly’s express permission – is hard for him to do even on the brightest of days. 

If there weren’t the strength of want lying between himself and Ross; the obvious pull and tug and burn that made his gut ache, then he wouldn’t even be here. He would’ve walked away ages ago.

Precisely what he can’t do now. He belongs here, making love with Ross on his couch, playing games with him, sucking down a beer over a warm dinner.

He feels bad that Holly’s caught between them but oh, is he not ready to give up the love he’s captured.

 

*** 

 

Ross’ fingers flex around Barry’s wrist. The plane has touched down in Huston with no skips or hops, and both men yawn, exhausted, and try to get their muscles in working order. 

To the naked eye, they look like any other traveling couple. They blend into the crowd and stride along happily with their bags, unthinking of home, of Holly, of the likely fact that she lay in Dan’s long arms.

It was complex and messy, and Barry moves under the weight of knowing Ross’ jealousy, of understanding that he wanted to keep his wife but knew that his love was doubled and rejoined in Barry. Life is difficult. Why should romance be any different?

One step at a time, Barry thinks, and sticks his thumb out to hail a cab.


End file.
